failure

ben goertzel




				the drama of my sadness
			delights me
				I drink it like grapefruit
			juice


WHAT THE FUCK???!! (drum roll (stampede of elephants))

why should i wake up
	overcome with sadness
i'm on vacation
	i'm having FUN now!!


		Is it this something missing madness?
		Is it my utter inability
			to record in words
			the essence of the universe?

		Is it the failure 
			of my twisted personality
		to emanate infinite love?

These words are not bad:
I've managed to capture something,
a kind of directness
missed before


			it means something
			to me at least

				But it's still a crock of
				shit, shit, shit


	Where is Ingredient X?
	do you have it?
	GIVE IT TO ME!  NOW, NOW NOW!

							Ah, there it is,
							I just had it,
						I pinched it right between
					my fingers
				But it fucking SLIPPED AWAY AGAIN...